Your Purpose as a Couple

(fulfilling God’s plan for your marriage)

Hosea 1:2-3

“2When the Lord began to speak through Hosea, the Lord said to him, “Go, take to yourself an adulterous wife and children of unfaithfulness, because the land is guilty of the vilest adultery in departing from the Lord.” 3So he married Gomer daughter of Diblaim, and she conceived and bore him a son.

Have you ever been told that you and your husband look good together, or that the two of you make a great couple? If so, how did it make you feel? Have you ever really thought about what it is that makes you a great couple, or if looking good together is just in a physical sense? I’m sure that there are a number of wonderful qualities that make you and your mate special, but why are you together? Is it because you have great chemistry, fell madly in love and decided to spend the rest of your life together, or is there more to it?

When thinking about the reasons that you and your spouse are together in marriage, it’s more than just being a cute or great couple. It’s about the plan that God has for your marriage. There are so many reasons that God could have possibly united the two of you. If you don’t know the reason, pray about it, and wait for Him to reveal it to you. There are marriages that are childless, abusive, have addictions (alcoholism, drugs, gambling, eating disorders, etc), or illnesses (depression, cancer, etc), some are adulterous, spiritual, or have financial challenges, there are believers married to unbelievers, and the list goes on. It’s very important to figure out the purpose for your marriage. You may want to begin by jotting down the likenesses that you share with your husband, as well as your differences. You can also include your strengths and weaknesses, as well as his. Note the similarities, and where you each bring balance to the other. Also, think about what types of childhood each of you had, were these similar, or vastly different?

Once you’ve written these down, pay close attention to what’s there and see if you can grasp the bigger picture. What are the most common things that you share? Does he remind you of your father in some ways, or do you remind him of his mother? Are you both good singers or do you both love to write? Is he an introvert and are you an extrovert or vice versa? Do you both share a passion for the same cause? These are questions that can assist in answering the question of your purpose as a couple.

When my husband and I first got married, I was excited about married life, and then I began to experience some personal emotional challenges on an extreme level. My husband was by my side in a way that no one else had ever been for me before. It was during this time of emotional healing and spiritual growth that I realized that God had sent “my him” to me for a reason and part of that reason was to be my support system during my time of darkness. Also, during this time I learned that not only was I a victim of childhood abuse, my husband had experienced childhood abuse also, only in a different way than I. I realized that we each had encountered such an extreme amount of childhood pain and it affected us in very similar ways. God gave us to one another to allow us to come to a place of awareness, understanding, acceptance and ultimately forgiveness of the things from our past that had controlled our lives in not such a good way. My husband and I have each had our season with dealing with these issues, and although we’ve experienced these at different points within the marriage, the result is the same, we are one another’s support system, and God is our strength and guiding light. God has a plan for us as a couple, and I believe that He is using two ordinary people to do extraordinary things! My husband is also good with words (he writes songs), and he too is a good speaker. God will use these like gifts that we share combined with our past experiences to bring blessings of healing to individuals who have similar pasts and wounds. If God can heal and change us, He can do the same for everyone!

Hosea 1:2-3 says: “2When the Lord began to speak through Hosea, the Lord said to him, “Go, take to yourself an adulterous wife and children of unfaithfulness, because the land is guilty of the vilest adultery in departing from the Lord.” 3So he married Gomer daughter of Diblaim, and she conceived and bore him a son. In summary, Hosea knew ahead of time that his wife would be unfaithful and that their marriage life would become a living object lesson to the adulterous northern kingdom. Hosea’s marriage to an unfaithful woman would illustrate God’s relationship to the unfaithful nation of Israel. It is difficult to imagine Hosea’s feelings when God told him to marry a woman who would be unfaithful to him. He may not have wanted to do it, but he obeyed. God often required extraordinary obedience from his prophets who were facing extraordinary times. God may ask you to do something difficult and extraordinary too. If he does, how will you respond? Will you obey him, trusting that he who knows everything has a special purpose for his request? Will you be able to accept the fact that the pain involved in obedience may benefit those you serve, and not you personally?

*Scripture quotations and summary are taken from the Life Application Study Bible (NIV).

Find the jewel in you, see the gem in him!

Treazure