Thursday, March 27, 2008

Do You (the second most important thing a wife can do for her husband)!

Proverbs 31:10-11, 31
Epilogue: The Wife of Noble Character
10h A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. 11Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value.
31Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

In writing the first series of columns, I ended the series with the topic of “Praying for your husband” (the first most important thing a wife can do for her husband), and now at the end of the second series, I would like to share the second most important thing that a wife can do for her husband, and that is “Do You”! It may sound a little harsh or self-centered at first, but let me explain. As a wife, I am very concerned (like most wives’ are), about the well-being of my husband. By well-being I’m speaking of everything from his health to his career, to his spirituality, finances, and his personal and social matters. If something is not balanced in any of these areas, there’s a need for even greater concern. Once concern kicks in high gear, there is a tendency to want to fix the situation. The first thing that I always do is pray, and then I wait for God to step in and work things out. However, there have been times when exercising patience took a turn for the worst, and I started damage control on my own. Well, as you know, setting out to do damage control as if I was better at getting matters under control than the Lord, proved to be the wrong answer.

Taking matters into my own hands, at times caused friction between myself and my husband because these issues were going on with him, and not only did I need to give him an opportunity to grow through his experiences, I definitely needed to allow God the opportunity to do his job in making the necessary changes within my mate (without my interference). Although my intentions were sincere I realized that I may have overstepped my boundaries a few times. God began to speak to me through prayer. He shared with me that indeed my feelings and concerns for my husband were justifiable; however, I needed to give Him room to do His work within my husband. He also shared with me that my role was to continue doing those things within my own life that He was leading me to do because He often works through the wife to get to the husband. Once this was revealed to me, I knew at that moment the importance of being a wife that is obedient to the Lord. I still fall short from time to time (probably more than that), but I always refer back to what God shared with me through prayer and meditation, which was also confirmed in the title of a book that I saw one day at the grocery store (during one of my fallen moments), “The single most important thing any woman can do for her husband: What God is leading you to do”. I can’t remember the author of the book, nor did I stand in the aisle to read it, I just praised God for the confirmation.

Today, I continue to do the things that God leads me to do, and I can honestly say that I know the meaning of the saying “leading by example”. I can acknowledge Him for using both my husband and myself to encourage growth in each other.

Proverbs 31:10-11, 31
Epilogue: The Wife of Noble Character
10h A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. 11Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value.
31Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

In summary: The book of Proverbs begins with the command to fear the Lord (1:7) and ends with the picture of a woman who fulfills this command. Her qualities are mentioned throughout the book: hard work, fear of God, respect for spouse, foresight, encouragement, care for others, concern for the poor, wisdom in handling money. These qualities, when coupled with fear of God, lead to enjoyment, success, honor, and worth. Proverbs is very practical for our day because it shows us how to become wise, make good decisions, and live according to God’s ideal.

Always remember that God is ultimately in control, and do your part to assist Him in reaching your mate. I’m not saying to not care about what’s going on with your spouse and be totally consumed in what you have going on: I’m saying to trust in the Lord to make the necessary changes and to resolve and heal situations that your mate may be going through, and know that He may be using you to do it!

*Scripture quotations and summary are taken from the Life Application Study Bible (NIV).

Find the jewel in you, see the gem in him!
Treazure

I would like to thank all readers of this column for yet another successful set of ten topics! In the weeks to come, I will continue to plan the “Find the jewel in you, see the gem in him” Workshop. The planning is moving along swiftly, so if you are interested in attending, email me at wifetalkblog@yahoo.com. I will be posting the details in the upcoming weeks.

For the 3rd series of Wife Talk, I will be doing a question/answer segment on a weekly basis, so if there are any questions that you would like to ask me, I will be posting both the questions and my response each week. I would also like to invite you to offer new topic suggestions for series 3 as well. You may contact me at the above listed email address for either of these. Again, thank you so much for logging in each week and last but not least, I would like to thank The Invisible Secretary for posting another series. God has blessed me with so many brilliantly shining jewels in which I place you all in my Treazure Chest!