No Romance without Finance

Luke 12: 22- 26
“22Then Jesus said to his disciples: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. 23 Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. 24 Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! 25 Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? 26 Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?”

It’s the daily topic of most of our discussions, in the work place, during play dates, or on the phone with our friends; we just can’t seem to help ourselves. It’s one of the things that we all have in common, although we may be in different classes. You can’t turn on the television without hearing about it on the news or it being the butt of a joke in a comedy or mentioned more seriously in a drama. Neither can you pick up the paper without viewing it in a headline, or subtitle. I’m talking about money! You can have an abundance of it, hardly any, or maybe you fall somewhere in between; but whatever the case; we are all affected by it in one way or another. The economy is in a recession, which means that we are being more mindful of how we spend our money. Most household budgets have changed in a way that we are more cautious of spending habits. Employment statistics are at an all time low (sending some into panic with worries of how to survive), as there is either one income or no income homes because so many Americans have lost their jobs. Money matters are never really cut and dry, as it is usually a topic that can spark heated debates in politics, careers, and in households.

We haven’t always been in a recession, although it may seem that way. However, money has been and still is on the list of most common reasons why married couples seek divorce. You may wonder why but think back to a time prior to marriage when you were concerned about making ends meet. If you’ve ever had a situation like that, then you know just how stressful it can be. Now, fast forward to the marriage where either one or both spouse(s) is stressed about finances. This can take a toll on a marriage in a big way. There are some couples that have money problems that don’t necessarily have anything to do with the recession. There are some husbands who are envious of their wife for example, because she earns a higher salary. There are some marriages that have financial issues because only one spouse works. There are also marriages that suffer because of lack of budgeting knowledge, or refusal of a spouse to stick to a budget, which can turn into money management problems. I’m sure, at some point, we have all had a bump or bruise in the money department.

Take my marriage for example; this is the one area that my husband and I have battled it out the most. For one, we share some commonalities about finances in that we both know that we need money to live, budgeting is necessary, and financial goal-setting is important. Implementation and dedication to these is the source of our issues, however. We come from similar backgrounds of family structure in that we’ve each witnessed our parents struggle to make ends meet and neither of us learned from them (at least not at a young age), about the importance of budgeting. My hubby learned about it from his mother when he was older. I learned of it (in my teens) from one of the most important women in my life, my Aunt Di. Although we didn’t live in the same city, once I started working she always used to stress the importance of being on a budget (giving God His, paying bills, paying yourself, and putting some in savings). I never applied what she taught me as I was very irresponsible with money. I used it for what I wanted and if I ran out, I would just wait to take care of “whatever needed to be taken care of” when I got my next check. Those days are long gone (thank the Lord) and now I value the information that she taught me. It’s so easy to be in a “rob Peter to pay Paul” situation, and a lot of marriages experience this.

If money is a problem in your marriage, it’s important to know why. I think that it’s important to reflect on what you learned about money as a child. It’s also important to loose yourself of bad habits with money. If money is scarce and you and your spouse are worried, it can become burdensome on the relationship causing other areas in your marriage to deteriorate. If financial issues are causing a strain on your marriage due to either the recession or otherwise, it is a direct reflection of lack of trust that God can supply your needs.

Luke 12: 22-26
“22 Then Jesus said to his disciples: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. 23 Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. 24 Consider the ravens: they do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! 25 Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? 26 Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?”

In summary: Jesus commands us not to worry. But how can we avoid it? Only faith can free us from the anxiety caused by greed and covetousness. It is good to work and plan responsibly; it is bad to dwell on all the ways our planning could go wrong. Worry is pointless because it can’t fill any of our needs; worry is foolish because the Creator of the universe loves us and knows what we need. He promises to meet all our real needs, but not necessarily all our desires.

Scripture quotations and summary are taken from the Life Application Bible (NIV).

The financial situation within each marriage may be different; however, the subject of money is the same. If you are free of money issues or if you have money problems, worrying about losing it or not having it to take care of your family needs should never worry you. When we worry about money we are ultimately giving up on believing that God is able to provide for us. It doesn’t matter that we are in a recession, because God’s resources are unlimited! Look to Him to guide you and your mate in being good stewards over your money as well as strengthening your faith that He can and will provide all your needs.

Find the Jewel in You, See the Gem in Him!

Treazure